Ugandan scholar swears to burn her priv@te p@rts if Museveni wins

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A Ugandan university lecturer has declared that she will burn her priv@te p@rts using live charcoal on a jiko if the incumbent President Yoweri Museveni wins Thursday elections.

Dr Stella Nyanzi of Makerere University’s Institute of Social Research made the bizarre pledge on her Facebook page where she gave a blow by blow account of how she intends to burn her g3n!t@ls.

REMOVE MY P@NT!ES

“If Museveni wins the presidential elections in February 2016, I will slowly remove my p@nt!es, sit by my burning charcoal-stove, roast my (unprintable) crunchy black, and use the burnt piece as a crayon to colour the Ugandan flag all black,” wrote the mother of three.

Dr Nyanzi has been expressing her political thoughts through artistic s3xu@l posts on Facebook since the campaign period started.

She said that if the electoral commission declares Museveni as the elected leader she will add to her pain by tampering with her br3@sts.

DIG OUT N!PPL3$

“I will get my h@e, carefully dig out my n!ppl3s from each br3@st, pound them into a red bloody paint to highlight the constitutional articles that r@p3d presidential term limits out of our land,” wrote the don.

The medical anthropologist, who has a PhD from the University of London, has also threatened to cut up her skull and remove her brains to be nailed on the parliament ceiling.

Dr Nyanzi concluded her post by stating that she intends to tamper with her reproductive system and make a necklace out of her organs to be sold wrapped in the Ugandan flag.

OVARIES

“I swear to God, I will pull out my fallopian tubes, ovaries and ut3rus, make them into a beautiful necklace and sell them wrapped in the national flag to the lowest bidder on e-bay. Where is the pride and honour in being a Ugandan citizen ruled for over thirty years by the same man?” posed the don.

Dr Nyanzi has been using Facebook to declare her disgust at the incumbent and has been an ardent supporter of the main opposition candidate, Kizza Besigye.